Went out with Rock and the boys on Sunday night. Weather was gorgeous and because of the holiday everyone was out. It was one of those nights where the conversation en route to bar #1 went like this:
Me: I think I'll just have one drink. Maybe two. I'm kinda tired.
Rock: Yeah, I have stuff to do tomorrow. I'll probably go home around 11:30 or midnight.
Me: If this were a TV show, it would cut to us dancing on tables at 2:30 a.m.
Yup. Out till 3.
At bar #2, a couple drinks and two shots in, I wasn't scrape-me-off-the-floor wasted (that came later), but drunk enough to type this out on my phone:
"Drunk text. Hi."
Guess who was the recipient? I'll give you a hint.
JB was at a winding-down barbecue and was also tanked. We proceeded to text for two hours, through getting a ride home from friends/procuring and eating a sub/watching Meet the Press (him) and imbibing more drinks and shots/dancing to Lady Gaga/stumbling to another bar (me).
All with proper spelling, capitalization and punctuation. Proving to me that at least one other person in this world gets more pretentious when they're wasted.
Here's the kicker:
At one point, JB suggested we grab a drink sometime.
I didn't hear from him yesterday and he's not at work today (as I knew he wouldn't be, because he told me on Friday).
I don't know if I should follow up on the drink invitation.
On the one hand, in vino veritas and all that. On the other hand, to paraphrase The Hangover, we all say dumb shit when we're fucked up. Or at least shit we don't mean.
And it's not like he said this out loud. It's in a text. Meaning he can go back and read our conversation, and pursue that opportunity if he wants to. (I didn't say yes or no at the time. Just proceeded with the texting.)
I think it'll be interesting to see how he acts around me tomorrow, and if he even acknowledges Sunday night. I'm not going to be too hard on him if he doesn't. Drunk happens.
As a silent-to-this-point lurker on this blog, I have to admit I only know you from what you've chosen to share, and that it's really none of my business - but I just have this strong, urgent need to warn you to run away from this as a dating situation.
ReplyDeleteThere are just like a million reasons this seems like a really bad idea, and only one reason that it *maybe* seems to make sense and I would want better & more fun for you than this situation.
Maybe it's just the name you chose for him, but I feel like he's the type to just flake out with a post-it note someday - and that all it's going to bring you is hassle and heartache if it's anything more than what it's been so far (a bad enough time/energy suck, but an even harder thing to go through when it's also a coworker and an ex of a friend!)
I mean - how many posts has this guy already rated for being rude? AND he's hung up on a friend/coworker of yours?
Ok, sorry to offer unsolicited internet advice!
I swear this is not in the spirit of trolling, I've just starting rooting for you & Rock (NOT in the 2.0 way, of course...), and from what you've said about Berger, I'm not sold on him being worth your time & emotional energy.
Best wishes! I love reading about both of your adventures.
Hi Jane!
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy you commented, and I’m glad you’re enjoying the blog and rooting for Rock and me!
I agree, there are a lot of red flags. Even on Saturday, I was with my family and it came out that I’d received a drunk text. My mom (who knows a little bit about the situation) wanted to know more, and I said, “I’m really not sure it’s a good idea.” Mom replied, “Oh, because you work together.” And I said, “No, not really. There are other factors that give me pause.”
And yet I’ll be honest…a weird part of me wants to see where this goes.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not going to aggressively pursue this. If we do hang out at all, it WILL be brought up that he never answered my initial invite and that made me feel bad. Rock has also said if he ever meets JB, Rock will be less friendly and more suspicious.
I think (I know) I am burned out on online dating. I’m not saying I’m going to settle for someone because he’s there, because a) a boyfriend is not a priority for me, and hasn’t been for a long time, and b) there’s only so much crap I can take. But it’s nice to talk to a straight guy who (despite his obvious communication and maturity issues) has things in common with me, rather than yet another back-and-forth messaging followed by an awkward coffee date.
That said, I still think it might be okay as a friends thing or a not-serious thing. If he pulls that shit again, it's done. If I even suspect I'm some sort of replacement for his ex, he's out (though I'm okay with being a rebound, as long as he's honest about it). If he whines to me about her, he's out (because she's my friend too).
Like I said in the post, it’ll be interesting to see what transpires tomorrow. Will any of the texting be acknowledged? Will it be business as usual, or like last week when both of us seemed to be avoiding each other (I was doing it too)? Now that his ex is no longer working here, will he be more comfortable talking to me?
I’m not going to invest a lot in this right now, but I also don’t want to totally write it off. Does that make sense?
If nothing else, it’s great blog fodder!