First of all, Happy New Year to all the lovers and lovees!
If this is your first time on the blog, a big ole WELCOME from me and Rock! Please forward this to all your friends and comment on all our relationship ridiculosity.
I am a quote whore, and recently I've read a few that really resonated with me. This is a blog about two boy-crazy kids looking at their dating habits and making positive changes. Here are two quotes I happened across on New Year's Eve:
The first, courtesy of my yoga teacher's quote bowl (yes, I'm a yoga nerd who gets all bendy-twisty by candlelight to ring in the New Year):
Habits of thinking need not be forever. One of the most significant findings in psychology in the last twenty years is that individuals can choose the way they think.--Martin Seligman
As someone who was more or less with the same guy for fourteen years, and thinks she has only one "type," this gives me hope. I resolve to keep an open mind with the dudes I'm seeking out and dating.
The next quote is from one of my favorite authors, David Levithan, co-writer of the novel Dash and Lily's Book of Dares. If you love beautiful writing and excellent stories of young love, RUN RUN RUN to the library/bookstore and check out Levithan's work. Dash and Lily is his third collaboration with fellow YA author Rachel Cohn: the two are best known for Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist (one of my favorite books, and the movie has this wonderful eighties teen comedy meets American Graffiti vibe). Dash and Lily isn't my favorite, but I do love this passage:
You think fairy tales are only for girls? Here's a hint--ask yourself who wrote them. I assure you, it wasn't just the women. It's the great male fantasy--all it takes is one dance to know she's the one. All it takes is the sound of her song from the tower, or a look at her sleeping face. And right away you know--this is the girl in your head, sleeping or dancing or singing in front of you. Yes, girls want their princes, but boys want their princesses just as much. And they don't want a very long courtship. They want to know immediately . . .
It's only when we try to make the girl or boy in our head real that the true trouble comes. Be careful what you're doing, because no one is ever who you want them to be. And the less you really know them, the more likely you are to confuse them with the girl or boy in your head . . . You should never wish for wishful thinking.
What did I get from this quote? It's good to want things, to have dealbreakers in mind. But you can't project your fantasies, your 100% perfect match, on to someone who will have their faults, who will fart in their sleep or occasionally use bad grammar, but might be totally awesome for you anyway.
Finally, I leave you with a gorgeous Tracy Chapman song that is all about what I resolve to do in the New Year, with respect to relationships:
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