Can't Say Goodbye, by Rock

So the guy I went out with on St. Patrick's Day called and left a voicemail asking me if I wanted to grab dinner sometime this week. I got the voicemail between dodgeball and work, and I had other things to take care of in between, so he didn't get a response right away.

After work, I also had a text from him asking the exact same thing.

Dude. I know with cell phones everyone is supposed to be accessible all the time in theory. But easy.

In theory, this really annoyed me. In all actuality, the text was a blessing because it meant I could respond by text instead of calling him.

"Hey! Sorry. Went straight from dodgeball to work: was planning on calling you back tomorrow. I had a good time on Thursday, but I don't think there's enough of a connection for any long-term potential. Sorry. Thanks again for a good time."

Still probably should have called him, but eh. It's a big step to even be able to handle that. Old me would be all "well if he sees a connection maybe I should give him a second chance." Imagine a weak, little, nerdy, pushover voice for that sentence.

Unfortunately, I wish I could say I handled ending things with the Faux Spaniard well. In all actuality, I just didn't end things.

We had brunch, we caught up, we walked around his neighborhood, we sat in the park and people watched. It was all fun, but a little awkward. I honestly wouldn't mind being friends with him at all. I honestly thought that because of how things were going- no hand-holding, no hugging, no hello kiss- that we were on the same page and things were going to be easier.

We went back to his place and watched some tv. With about five minutes left in the show, he awkwardly puts his hand on my knee. I grab it. The show ended and I left for work. We kissed good-bye briefly. So awkward.

My new plan is to call him this week and talk it out over the phone. I feel like I can handle that better than in person. I'll never get my books back, but I can replace them and consider the cost a "don't lend books to boys that you might not want to stick around" learning fee. What's sad is that I will quote 2.0's break-up speech to him: "It's been feeling more platonic for a while, but I wanted to see. I was rooting for us."

Speaking of 2.0, he responded to my email saying hello. It was courteous and brief.