But tonight I called into work for the first time in probably four years. I haven't been bedridden in about two years. And I've spent the past two days mostly cooped up in my studio apartment, watching way too much television.
I usually like to be left alone when I'm sick, but damn it if it wouldn't be nice right now to come over, make me soup, rub my back, and shush off my protests that I don't want to get him sick and he should leave.
I want someone that I would allow to see me vulnerable in a way that I hide from my most of my friends.
That's all. Just a change in priorities right now. At least temporarily, the fear of intimacy is gone.
Glad you are feeling better. I know what you mean about wanting someone to take care of you. When I had bronchitis last year and was laid up for several days, because I had no other choice, it would have been REALLY nice for someone to bring me soup and mashed potatoes (the only things I could swallow), remind me to take my meds, and drive me to the doctor.
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