NEW IN TOWN, by Doris

"How was your Thanksgiving?"  What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

I'm sure I sound defensive right now.  But when you get a random text from the guy you've been seeing on and off for fourteen years, who recently DIDN'T contact you for two months until you found out via your parents and his that he has a "serious girlfriend" and your mom's more broken up about it than you are . . . well, it's kind of a gut reaction.

Me and the dude, let's call him Ex-calibur, we've never exactly been friends.  We met when we were just seventeen (him) and two days shy of sixteen (me).  At that time I was convinced no boy in the world would ever like me, and I was soooo old not to be dating.

Now I see us for the embryos we were.

Did we stay together that long (six years mostly on, eight years mostly off) because it was right, or because it was easy?  I guess I'll never know.  At any rate, I don't know if I've seen the last of Ex-calibur.  He's had serious girlfriends before, has been known to call me--drunk and sober--whenever they have a fight, and then again after the breakup.

And for a long time, that worked for me.

I'll own it.  It was friends-with-benefits in every sense of the word.  He was amazing in bed.  But he was also fun to talk to and snuggle with while watching MST3K (he'd put on the Mike eps for me even though he was strictly a Joel man).  When I lost my job four years ago, he was the first person I got ahold of.  I was there when we were younger and his parents' divorce was incredibly nasty.  We've used each other, fought tooth and nail, disagreed more often than agreed, loved, hated, you name it. 

I'm not a victim.  I was a willing participant.

In the meantime, however, I didn't really date.

While Ex-calibur was getting serially monogamous (sort of), I had various crushes that went nowhere.  Once I slept with one of Rock's friends--this is when Rock and I were living together, which made for an awkward Sunday morning.  I've dallied, made out a little bit, even tried Craigslist (nothin' too dirty).

But dating?  I've always thought it wasn't my thing.

I'm still not convinced.  Six years of being in a serious relationship, when I was very young to boot, has me thinking that I rather like flying solo.  That said, I'd like to get laid again before my thirty-fifth birthday.  And as Rock points out, it's not just the sex.  Sometimes you just want someone to watch MST3K with.

So when Rock, my best buddy of ten years--since I told him Survivor was shit, he accused me of not having a TV, and we just sort of went from there--proposed Our Grand Six Month Dating and Blogging Experiment, I was sorta game.

The very next day, I found out about Ex-calibur's dating situation.  

Now I'm really game.

It's not a revenge thing.  I wish Ex-calibur well.  Though I hope he stops texting me.

Because I want to meet some dudes (surely there are some in this big beautiful city who won't find me totally repulsive).

And for the record?  My Thanksgiving was great.